Happy New Year 2012:

Today I am making my 2012  Mary Box.
If you have asked me to pray for you then your name is in here.
I ask our lovely Blessed Mother for help to intervene with her son.

Hail Mary, Full of Grace, the Lord is with thee
Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of they womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners,
Now and at the hour of our death, Amen.

I remember getting corrected in Catholic School when I said,
"pray for OUR sinners" and the nun let me know  it was US who are the sinners!!

How to End 2011:

                                     Yesterday I had a wonderful 11/2 hour massage

 And then picked beautiful scented Meyer lemons
from this heavily laden tree...

And finished off with a latte that just so happened
warmed my heart!

Today I had a wonderful three hour lunch with a friend...

Now THIS is my way to end a good year!  I hope your
ending of this year reflects your blessings from the past
and the hopes for many more in the coming future of 2012.
What are your plans?

The Possible Results of Stress:

Loralie from the Art Department

A painted picture of what happens when you combine the emotional, mental, spiritual and social stressors that have been covered in the last two blogs. These physical problems may occur:
     Appetite change
     Headaches
     Tension
     Fatigue
     Insomnia
     Weight change
     Colds
     Muscle aches
     Digestive upsets
     Pounding heart
     Accident prone
     Teeth grinding
     Rashes or skin problems
     Restlessness
     Foot-tapping
     Finger-drumming
     Increased alcohol, drug or tobacco use

Anything sound familiar?            

Is Your Stress Adding Up:

I bought this wonderful ribbon candy because I remember it so well from childhood!
It helps to think of pleasant memories...Share them and smile.


SOCIAL STRESSES:
 Isolation
      Intolerance
     Resentment
  Lashing out
Hiding
     Clamming up
             Lowered sex drive
Nagging
Distrust                            
                          Fewer contact with friends
       Lack of intimacy    
 Using people


EMOTIONAL STRESSES:
Anxiety
Frustration
The Blues
Mood Swings
Bad Temper
Nightmares
Crying spells
Irritability
"no one cares"
Depression
Nervous Laugh
Worrying
Easily Discouraged
Little joy

Just check your symptoms you've experienced lately to see where you're at...

Source: wellbeing Magazine vol.3no1

A Spiritual and Mental Stress Test:

Here's a little SPIRITUAL  STRESS test...
_ Emptiness
_ Loss of meaning
_ Doubt
_ Unforgiving
_ Martyrdom
_ Looking for magic
_ Loss of direction
_ Needing to prove self
_ Cynicism
_ Apathy
*

Here is a MENTAL STRESS test...
_ Forgetful
_ Dull senses
_ Poor concentration
_ Low productivity
_ Negative attitude
_ Confusion
_ Lethargy
_ Whirling mind
_ No new ideas
_ Boredom
_ Spacing out
_ Negative self talk





 This is for your own information. If you have any concerns get checked out. Tomorrow will be a social and emotional test. This affects your health and can add up...so,  how are you doing?

*wellbeing Magazine vol.3No.1

Download a Book Today:

 Just in case Santa Claus brought you some technology for Christmas...
This story can be downloaded to your new PC or laptop computer, an I-pad, I-phone, Nook, The Amazon Kindle, Sony, etc...

This is a chance or an excuse to download a book that has been highly recommended for Mother's, survivors, nurses, doctors, police, teachers, all professionals who work with children.  The main purpose is to raise your awareness in the community. The proceeds from the sale of this book support group programs of recovery for survivors.

Purchase at http://emalouking.blogspot.com under Resources...
This book is also available in softcover on a link at the same site.

May we live in peace starting with our own homes and branching out to our neighborhoods, churches, schools and the community now and in 2012.

Happy Birthday, Jesus:

~ WELCOME  ~


Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday dear Jesus
Happy Birthday to you.

                                                                                 

                                                             
         

Christmas Eve 2011:

    ~ Christmas Eve ~    

Hopefully you were able to balance all the things

you had to get finished today.

The big sales are happening, the traffic

is heavy and the aisles in the stores are packed with

the late-comers this year. Hope you are not one of them.

The Church's Christmas season begins tonight

and goes until January 9, 2012. Be sure and

leave up some small decorations to remind you

of the 12 Days of Christmas.

Attend the church of your choice.

God bless you and may you find peace and joy!

Merry Christmas                                    

The Good News:

The other day I saw a woman at the corner holding a paper plate with the message "need cash for gas."
I stopped and asked where her car was located, told her to get it and go to the gas station next door and I would fill her up. She lost her job and was sleeping in her car as evidenced by the pillow and blanket in the back seat and the peanut butter and crackers. She thanked me, was grateful, and surprised that someone would do that for her.
 Then the next day I saw a younger girl at a different corner with a rectangular sign that said...
"Need cash for gas."  I guess good news travels fast!!
AND

The Good News
Never has one life touched so many...
God sent his only Son into the world
and we are awaiting his birth soon.
May you have Peace and Joy.
Merry Christmas!

                                                                               

De-clutter and renewal:

Do you ever have more than you need?

It is amazing to me how easily my stuff multiplies.

Yesterday I took 75 pounds of paper to the shredders.
It was fun watching it get pulverized.

Today I detached even  more and took 5 boxes of books to Goodwill.

I'm getting renewed again for the New Year as a gift to myself.

It's time for another do-over with a fresh start!

I am doing this while I anxiously await the birthday of the Christ Child.

Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah

Winter Begins:

It's the first day of winter and only 4 days until Christmas!

Stressed out with the rush of things?
Here are some helpful suggestions...

Set your clothes out the night before

Get up 15 minutes earlier

Repair things that don't work properly

Do everything in moderation

Take a different route to work 

A Humble Gift Given in Love:

So Sorry...

For some reason this blog did not appear today as it was set up.

I presented the story of the poinsettia.

It is rumored that a poor little girl had nothing to present to the Christ Child

so she picked some weeds and bunched them together and when she gave her

humble gift it blossomed into what we call a poinsettia. 

Monday 12-19-11:

It's the beginning of the Fourth week of Advent
and we continue to wait for the birth of the Christ Child.
The manger is in the center of my wreath this year and on Christmas
morning I will place and welcome the Christ Child in his bed of straw and rejoice. 
Some people even bake a birthday cake and sing.
What do you do in your family?
Remember Stress is an attitude...get enough sleep!

                                           

5 Stress Relievers:

Avoid tight fitting clothes.

Avoid negative people.

Always have a Plan "B".

Ask for help for the jobs you dislike.

Always make copies.

Candlelight:

Remember

A candle loses nothing lighting another candle.

How have you done this in the season of Advent?

Books in Your Home:

I get excited when I see something creative like the scrabble letters
used here to identify the book category.
I like to see items used for other things than their intended purposes.
The letters needed for my book - M-E-M-O-I-R.

When I made "home" visits as a Public Health Nurse one important observation was
the number of  books spotted in the home.  Sometimes there were none and in other
households there were stacks of them. That tells a lot about the people who live there.
What topics are they reading and do they read to their children? Pornography is a red flag.

I wrote my e-book memoir so the reader would be better informed...not to entertain.
It is applicable for a large population since one out of three girls are molested and one out of six boys.
It is available now in softcover  to reach people who do not use e-readers.
If you know a mother of a survivor this story might help heal them...please purchase.
The proceeds from the sales will help programs for survivors.
Thank you.

Using your Senses at Christmas:

How do we get into the holiday mood when we're not? 
Rely on your senses...

Baking cookies, cakes, pies and bread that have been traditions in the family and sampling brings in both of the senses of SMELL and TASTE.

Stringing lights on the outside and the inside of the house  and remembering that God is the light of the world is the sense of SIGHT.

Listening to the Christmas music on intercoms, the radio and caroling in the streets, attending choir concerts. I sang this morning at a nursing home and the faces of the people lit up as they joined in. The sense of SOUND.
And joining hands, we used our sense of TOUCH and said the Lord's Prayer with the seniors.

"Fake it til you make it" is a 12 step slogan. It works here too!

writing prompt:

Can we go home now??

Mothers of Survivors:

This baby needs a lullaby.  Can you make up the words to sing, Mama?

Parenting is really a tough one. No one tells you that it
will bring you your most joy and your most sorrow.
No one understands sleep deprivation like new parents.
You must figure out what's up when they are too young to speak...
You need support and someone to question who has already been through this.
 Another (supportive)  mother to talk to helps each situation.
So, Mother to Mother...if you have been suspicious or you think something's amiss...
Contact me- emalouking@ AOL.com and we can talk
You can figure out a plan of action and protection and get help
from the Resources listed on this site. Don't hesitate to use them.

Sexual Perpetrators:

A Sex Crime of Control, Power and Violence
A perpetrator gravitates to persons who are too polite to fend him off...
A perpetrator gravitates to persons who are shy and anxious who are unable to tell him to leave...
A perpetrator gravitates to a person too dependent to be aggressive...
A perpetrator gravitates to someone too impressed by status and power to be able to do the right thing. 

                The perpetrator associates with adults who can't address this issue and charms people who do  not believe this could ever happen.

                                                                                         

Advent Week Three:

Today is Gaudete Sunday.(the pink candle is lit.) We have passed the half way point in Advent
And are encouraged to continue on our spiritual journey in anticipation of Christmas.
Are you prepared to make changes in your life?  Do you have realistic expectations?
Repent is really...re-invent. Be the best self you can be. It  feels like a do-over is in the air.
 Are there bad habits you can break?   Any time is a good time for doing that!

Now A Paperback Edition:

     In the interest of time and in lieu of the constant reminder of  rampant sexual abuse, my E-book memoir, UNDER MY ROOF is now available in paperback. This is an opportunity to reach those who don't have or use computers and other technical e-readers. Some people still like the feel of the paper, the ability carry it around, mark it up and dog ear the corners. And of course, pass it on to a friend.
  So many people are silently suffering. Let's break the silence of this invisible crime! This is a must read...supportive and hopeful for the survivor. It is also a book club recommendation. Here is the link: available under resources here on the site or
http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/2793960
There is a savings on the shipping thru Dec.9, 2011 - code-NORUDOLPH

Mother to Mother:

Enough, already...aren't we tired of talking about sexual abuse?
Guess what? We have yet to begin to hear all the stories.
Each day more is revealed. Each day a girl/woman or boy/man
steps up and discloses what happened  and attempts to make the
perpetrator accountable to all of us!  We are hearing about the 'famous' or well-known
survivors on the nightly news and on television talk shows.
But this crime crosses all barriers of color, race, religion and financial status.
Blessings+ to all those who come forward and "tattle!"

My book percolated in a corner of my brain, whispered to me,
took up valuable space, and begged to be written. (for 25 years).  Now it's here and soon,
very soon, for those who do not use the electronic methods, you will be able
to read it in paperback.  You can turn pages, carry it around.
high-lite, underline, take notes and dog ear the corners.

 Paint the town with exposures and announcements. Plaster the messages on walls
  Stop this crime.  Support the survivors and If you know a MOTHER
of a survivor this book is for her.

Mother to mother...

Each one reach one.

Feast of the Immaculate Conception:

 More victims have come forward in the Sandusky case.
That's great they are breaking their silence.
We support those who keep hope and stand up against
these heinous crimes made against them.



Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee
Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners
now and at the hour of our death, Amen.


We need prayers to pull us through the abuses
Those suffered by our fellow man/woman/ child
impact all of us terribly.


Prayer is an answer...
Don't stop before the miracle is heard in 12 step programs
Keep hope alive     Reach out to those who are
wounded and traumatized.
NOW.  

Pearl Harbor:

Child Abuse and the Impact on the Brain

What more can anyone say...

The brain activity of a child who is a victim of family violence shows

 the same brain activity as a soldier who has been in combat.

Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day  (US)

St. Nicholas::

Today is the feast of St. Nicholas. It is celebrated by putting your shoes on the stoop and waiting to see what
St. Nicholas will put in your shoe.
No one ever wanted to get chunky bricks of coal (like from the outdoor grill) for
misbehaving. But, I see things have changed;
Unlike my childhood, fresh and chef prepared lumps. What???
They even look delicious!


At my age, I think about the words in the song..."You better watch out, you better not cry,
You better not pout, I'm telling you  why..."   (lyrics from Santa Claus is coming to Town)
But when these words  are said by a perpetrator to a child , it's a threat,  it spoils their sweetness and innocence,
steals a childhood   and   betrays a trust.

Being good means not keeping secrets.  If you have a hard time talking...sing it!
Create a song, use your  inside words and use your outside words.


I will always keep Christ in Christmas- I promise.
                                                                                                                     

Book Club Recommendation:

I get goose bumps looking at this snowy cold picture. 
What do you do in the winter? Where do you go?  Do you happen to belong to a
Book club that meets all through the year?
Looking for a good book to read? Here is a suggestion for your future list.
Under My Roof  will soon  be out in paperback. More information to come...
Right now you can read it electronically on your iPhone, iPad, Nook Book, Kindle, e Reader or computer.

I get goose bumps reading this story...until the ending.
All proceeds are donated to programs to promote healing for survivors
and start programs for Mother's of survivors.

Chose this indirect donation method and help someone out this year during the holidays.

The Journey Week 2:

The SEASON of Advent is a reminder of the growing darkness-
of indifference, hatred, ignorance and pride.
The Advent WREATH is a reminder of the growing power of light
which to Christians is Christ.

This is a good time to check out our lives and see what it is that
distracts us so that we are disconnected from God.
All of the addictions can do that...food, sex, money, work, gambling, etc.
There are also material things like possessions and shopping.
Now most of us shop and cook and get into the hub-bub so the best way
to handle it is to find balance. Just eating one meal together, lighting a candle
and saying a prayer will take the edge off .
I dare you!

Writing Prompts:

Seen at Grey Bears!

Ever weave a good made up story?
Ever get  strung along?
Ever use this to wrap a  package?  What was in it...
Ever make something out of yarn?
Ever do needle point or have a sewing project?
Ever string popcorn for your Christmas tree?
Ever donate this material to groups?

There's a story in here someplace.
Have fun and spend 10 minutes writing about it.
That's all.

Good Night:

"It's only the sleep you get before midnight that counts"
                   -mom

Rearrange your schedules to make this work for you.
Thank goodness for television program recorders, so
Good night, sleep tight and don't let...

Friends:

Real friends, the special people in our lives,
are those who,
when you've made a fool of yourself,
don't feel you've done a permanent job.

                      **  The past should be a springboard, not a hammock.